#113: The First Technique in Martial Arts [Video + Podcast]

Welcome to Episode #113 of the Fight for a Happy Life podcast, “The First Technique in Martial Arts.”

Do you remember the first technique you learned in the martial arts? Was it a jab? A block? Maybe a breakfall?

Whatever it was, let me ask you—would you say it was also the most important technique? If not—

Don’t you think it should be?

Over the years, I’ve learned a wide range of both practical and somewhat “fancy” moves, but the fact is NONE of them will work on their own. That was a problem until I figured something out…

There’s actually a powerful technique you can include before any move to increase its chances of succeeding! I’d say it’s not only the most important lesson in the martial arts, it may be the most important lesson in living a happy life.

What is that technique? Just hit “play” and I’ll be happy to break it down for you! 🙂

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The First Technique in Martial Arts

Here’s the video. If the player doesn’t work, click this direct link.

As always, if you’d like to keep the conversation going, feel free to leave a comment here or through my Contact Page.

TRANSCRIPT

Hi ho, Ando here from Happy Life Martial Arts. In a great mood today, hope you are too. Welcome to episode #113 of Fight for a Happy Life, the show that believes even a little martial arts makes life a whole lot better. Ain’t it the truth?

Sitting here today in my cool Mantis Boxing Rash Guard. Maybe you can see the mantis there. This comes from my friend, Randy Brown.

Sifu Randy and I, as you may know, just held a four-day in-person Kung Fu training camp up in New Hampshire. And may I say, it was a success. It was fun. I think everyone learned something and no one died.

That’s the formula for a success. Fun, learning, and no deaths.

We’ll probably have another event similar to that coming up. Maybe you could join us at the next one. Get your own cool rash guard. I’d really like that.

But let me tell you about the best takeaway I got from the camp because that’s the topic today. When I showed up, I really didn’t know who was going to be there. I mean, yes, there’s a registration, but I hadn’t worked with almost any of them.

So I didn’t know what they were going to do or certainly how they were going to do it. It’s a big mystery. And that forced me to prioritize what I was going to do. I want to be prepared for anything.

So then the question becomes, well, what are the priorities? What do I need to do first so that I’m prepared to be at my best no matter what happens? In other words, what should be your first technique? What is the most important technique to start this engagement with?

I’m also curious, what was your first technique?

I’m curious because you would think that the first technique that you’re ever taught would be also the most important technique from your teacher’s point of view. So, if you can remember, I would love it if in the comments you would just let me know, what was the first thing you ever learned in a martial arts class?

Was it a jab, a block, a breakfall, an armbar? I’m just curious, what was it? And, if you have the time, do you feel it was the most important lesson that you ever learned? Where did it fall in to what you learned later?

I would suggest to you that the first technique in martial arts, the most important technique in martial arts that you should learn, is preparation.

I mean specifically, preparing to face a challenge. The technique before the technique, if you will. The technique before you move. I’m talking about optimizing your state of mind and your state of body so that you will perform at your best no matter what happens. That makes sense, right?

Here’s the problem. Let’s say you are sparring with someone. You put your hands up and right away, they grab your wrist.

Now, in that instant, what happened to you? Who are you? When you felt that wrist grab, come on, there’s a physical reaction. You feel that pressure, a little bit of impact maybe, maybe even some pain.

On the psychological side, there’s also a reaction. Maybe you are a little afraid, maybe you’re a little embarrassed, caught you off guard. Maybe you feel weak because this person really grabbed aggressively. You might even feel stuck. You could instantly feel trapped.

Let’s just recognize that in that instance, in that instant, you’ve just become suboptimal. You are not at your best. Whatever moves that you’ve learned, punches or kicks or grab escapes, even specifically this type of guard grab wrist attack, whatever you’re going to do is not going to be at your best because your mental state and your physical state have now changed.

A minute ago, maybe you were feeling great. You felt powerful, you felt unlimited, you felt comfortable in your body. And now all of a sudden, that one quick instant, that all changed.

This could happen, maybe, let’s say sparring. Have you ever had this experience? You’re feeling great. And they’re pairing up partners for sparring. Could be at a tournament, could be in your class. And they say, okay, you are going to spar that person. And you look over…

Now, that first look is what I’m talking about. Your feelings in that first look. If you look over and it’s an eight year old kid, you probably feel safe. You probably feel competent. You probably feel like you can have some fun with this.

But sometimes you look over and that first look is somebody bigger than you, stronger than you. Maybe you don’t know them and they look mean. Maybe they’re a higher rank. Maybe they have a reputation for hurting people. Maybe they’ve hurt you.

So how do you feel now? You might start off your match already feeling defeated. You may already feel like you don’t have much of a chance. You are automatically suboptimal. And now that was just in the context of a class.

Imagine you’re walking down the street and suddenly someone shoves a knife in your face. Imagine suddenly someone puts a gun in your face. Imagine suddenly three guys grab you and drag you behind a building.

I just want to be clear that whatever that first feeling that you get, whatever fills your soul, that is going to determine your capability to defend yourself, to fight.

Let’s be very clear…

No matter what style you study, no matter how long you’ve been training, no matter what kind of shape you’re in, your second technique will not work or certainly won’t work as well as it could unless you’ve mastered the first technique, which is managing your state of mind and your state of body as you are first confronting a situation.

Now this topic I actually discussed a little bit in a recent video called, The Most Important Stance. And in that video, I was kind of being cute that the most important stance was not the horse stance or a cat stance or a front stance or any stance that we really focus on that looks cool. I suggested that the most important stance was the ready stance!

In traditional martial arts, we’ve been given a gift of some type of preparatory stance before you do a form or even before you spar. You have a chance to stand at the ready. That is your time to practice putting yourself in an optimal state. To power up, to get your mind right and get your body right and, yes, your spirit right. Whatever comes after that is just an expression of the resources you just pulled together.

Your ready stance pulls your power together, kiyotsuke, and then you get ready to use it, yoi, and then you move it around. You play with it. You express it.

So in that moment, that preparatory stance, who are you? How great are you? How great do you feel? How ready are you really to face whatever’s coming next?

Even if you’re not in a traditional martial art, you still have that moment before maybe you touch gloves or you slap and knuckle up. You have that moment to get your head together before you engage. That’s one advantage, perhaps, over self-defense, where you may not, you may get sucker punched or caught off guard. But at least in training, we have this chance to develop who we are. And you should really think about that for a second.

Self-defense. Think about those words. Self-defense. Who is the self? Who are you protecting? You at your best.

We are training to develop ourselves to be the best we can. Then we’re trying to defend it so that nobody can take it away from us.

We train to be optimal human beings. And then we train to have the power to hold on to that. We don’t want to lose it on our own. And we certainly don’t want it to be taken away from us by someone else.

If you think about it, that’s what a bad guy does. That’s what makes them a bad guy. The bad guy is trying to make you forget how powerful you are.

They’re trying to minimize you. They’re trying to shrink you in your space. They’re trying to make you feel helpless. They’re trying to make you feel unworthy.

They’re trying to make you feel voiceless. Like whatever you have to say doesn’t matter. They are trying to make you less than your best. And it is my opinion that the less best you go, the more danger comes into your life. The more you’re led down that path, where you’re either giving away power or letting power be taken from you, the more danger you are going to be in.

Again, we’re here to train, to maximize our power and hold on to it, no matter what happens.

Think about some professional fighters. Now, it’s no secret that a pro fighter, that’s a hard life. And I’m sure you’ve seen enough documentaries or followed your favorite fighter to see the struggles that they have to go through sometimes, whether it’s just the losing weight or having injuries, having a bad training camp, coming into a fight, tired with jet lag, maybe there’s a family drama going on, maybe they’re having some problems with their diet, maybe they’ve got food poisoning. There are all kinds of things that a pro athlete has to deal with.

But when the event shows up, when it’s time to get in there and perform, it’s time to perform. The champions in sport find a way to be their best even under bad circumstances. Even when it seems that everything is against them, they still find a way to keep fighting and bring up their best performance. That’s what champs do and that’s what we should do.

Whether or not you’re a professional fighter or professional athlete of any kind, you get the point. Real life is the ultimate match. It’s the ultimate tournament.

You are more than a professional athlete. That’s not derogatory to say, well, you’re not a professional fighter. No, no, no. You’re bigger than that because real life is bigger than any one sporting event. That’s why martial arts is not just a sport, it’s a lifestyle. It’s a way of life.

We are preparing to be at our best in all situations, not just when the whistle blows. Yes, not just the ring, the ring of life we’re talking about here.

Okay, so if you agree with me that it’s all about the preparation, it’s about how we face challenges first before we start taking actions that matters. We’ve got to ask how. How do we get better at this?

How do we optimize ourselves and maximize our resources?

I think it starts simply by recognizing it and saying, okay, I’m going to prioritize that first feeling. I am going to prioritize my optimization that I practice feeling my best everywhere I go.

I think some of us take that for granted. You just kind of wake up in the morning and you go. You have a routine and you just start checking off the boxes. You go through your day. But maybe you didn’t make it a priority to prepare yourself for the day. That’s what we need to fix.

We want to make our psychology our number one priority. And I’m going to hit you with four Cs. For me, the four Cs to optimize my psychology, my mindset for the day.

I want to be calm. I want to be clear headed. I want to be comfortable. And I want to be confident.

How do you do that?

I believe in minimizing the drama in your life. Oh, pick your battles carefully, my friend. Pick your battles carefully. Use your energy wisely. Maximize your resources whenever possible.

Don’t get sucked into someone else’s agenda, someone else’s problems, someone else’s drama, someone else’s priority list. Make your own psychology number one.

Now, since we’re talking about sports anyway, think about some pro athletes. How do some of these champs get into that state where they can defy setbacks? You’ve seen it.

Many pro athletes before a match will put on some headphones and listen to their favorite music. Maybe some will go off into a corner and have a ritualized warm-up procedure that they go through. Maybe some wear a favorite pair of lucky socks. They set superstitions and rituals that put them in the mindset to be at their best no matter what.

I can think of a Taekwondo instructor who was the master in the school. He was the top guy. And he was always very composed, very controlled. And once in a while when he would come out and do some sparring, he was always a little reserved, conservative in his technique. And most people were respectful of that and would just match that tone.

But every once in a while, there would be some hot shot student who would forget himself and start going after the master a little recklessly, out of control. And this master had a ritual when that happened…

He would step away for a moment, just a moment. He would turn around, take a breath, and tighten his belt. And after he tightened his belt, he would turn around and he had his game face on. And then he would put his foot through your chest.

So that’s interesting, but how about you? Do you have a ritual to be at your best?

If you’re going on a job interview, when was the last time you went on a job interview? You probably had some type of ritual to get yourself in the right mindset. Maybe you went over your resume, started rehearsing answers to common questions, looked at yourself in the mirror, you put on special clothes, whatever. You went in to make the best impression possible and to perform at your best.

What about a first date? Have you been on a first date lately? I have not. But I sure remember that you want to perform at your best, show up at your best.

What about just going to class? Do you have a ritual before you go into class or while you’re putting on a uniform?

What about just getting up in the morning? Like I said, most people I think just dive into their day and they don’t take a moment to prepare themselves for the day. How do you get up?

Do you meditate or say a prayer, have a cup of coffee in the quiet, pump out 10 squats, 10 push-ups, 10 sit-ups? Do you have a ritual?

I’m not prescribing what your ritual should be. I’m just suggesting that knowing yourself so that you can develop a ritual to be your best self is a great idea. I think it’ll make your whole day better.

It may take some time to study that, to research that, to figure out who do I need to be to succeed in this art, in this class? How much time do I need to spend on conditioning versus meditating versus visualizing versus partner practice versus solo practice?

That may take some time to figure out a formula for yourself. But once you figure it out, then you can get through it more quickly.

And that’s what would lead me to another thought here, to give yourself time for state breaks, right? You have a state of mind, you have a state of body. You spend time developing what you want the character that you want, the person that you want to be, not just in your class now, but everywhere you go in life.

And sometimes you’re going to need to take little breaks to get yourself back into that character because it’s very easy to get knocked out of character, to forget the person that you want to be or to forget the person that you are because there are so many outside influences pushing in on you, expecting things from you, trying to screw you up sometimes.

That’s the nature of self-defense. That’s what bad guys are trying to do–screw you up, make you forget who you are and what you can do.

So, I encourage you to develop this ritual for yourself. Maybe it involves just taking a breath. You just are able to take a deep breath, get your power back, and now you’re back on.

Maybe you have a mantra that you develop for yourself. Something you can say when you get scared, when you get hurt, when you’re starting to feel hesitation about taking an action you know you need to take. Something you can say to yourself.

Maybe it’s a smile. I find a smile to be very, very powerful, and it has a physical effect as well, a reaction through the body.

Maybe you just clap your hands, maybe you rub your hands together, maybe you squeeze your fists. It can be something very physical. Maybe you stretch.

Maybe you just have a totem of some kind. Maybe you wear a ring, or you get a tattoo, or you always wear a special necklace. Something that reminds you who you want to be or who you are.

I think it’s really important that we have that little touchstone in behavior or attitude or thought that snaps us back to our full power. As you move through your day and you feel a dip, you feel that little slide away from your 100% optimal self, you have this technique to get it back.

This is the first technique I believe that we should have as martial artists and as human beings how to sense when your power is lessening and how to snap and get it back as fast as you can. To be aware of that first feeling of loss and be able to immediately whiplash into gain.

And don’t get me wrong, this is hard. This is really difficult. I’m a grown man in his 50s now, and it’s still shocking how quickly I can either lose power on my own or have it taken away from me. I think it’s very natural to shrink, to give up sometimes. To give in to thoughts of failure or to just not wanting to play the game anymore. Just being exhausted by trying so hard all the time.

I get it. Particularly if you compare yourself to others. Not just in person. Oh, I got to spar with this guy, he’s way younger, stronger, better. But even if you’re just watching a movie or television, you think, ah, look at this person. They’re so far ahead of me. They’re so much better than I am. What am I doing? Why do I even try anymore?

As far as self-defense goes, it could be someone just raising their voice. That could cause you to give up some power. Someone could make a direct threat to you. That could make you lose some power. Someone just by getting closer to you could make a change in your body or your mindset. That leads to danger.

I just, oh, you know what I just realized? Even the weather, even the weather, I have a window right here outside the camera and it’s a cloudy day, threatening rain. Some people would look at that and even let that take them out of their optimal state.

You wake up, you start your ritual, ah, I’ve got my green tea and I’ve stretched for 10 minutes. Everything’s great. Oh, I look out the window, there’s a cloud. What a terrible day.

No, no. Don’t be tricked, my friend. Don’t let anyone trick you into believing that you’re not powerful, and don’t trick yourself into believing that you’re not powerful.

We have to believe as martial artists and as enlightened human beings that there’s always something we can do. There’s always some way for us to fight back, to keep fighting for what’s important to us in life.

So that’s the goal. We want to skip the dip.

As you move through your day today, and you have these fluctuations of confidence and fluctuations in comfort, skip the dip.

When you feel it going down, get to your state break. Get your mindset again. Feel better in your body. Get back to your optimal self.

Why? So that we can perform at our best and get more out of life. That’s the point.

So this is my challenge to you now, my friend. It’s very simple…

Step one. The challenge is, first, identify your first feelings.

In any given moment today, just be aware of how you’re feeling. Become aware. Pick a measure.

Start with your heart rate. Someone says something unkind. You feel your heart starting to increase, adrenaline starting to flow.

Okay, just identify it. Just say, hey, I notice that this person is getting my heart going.

Check out your shoulders. That’s another way to measure how you’re feeling. Are you calm and clear and comfortable and confident? Are your shoulders starting to come up? Is your neck getting tighter?

Just identify it. Don’t judge it as good or bad. Just at least be aware of it first. Like, huh, there’s a change happening in my body.

What about your mind? Is something happening to you where suddenly you feel you should just be quiet? You don’t want to say anything. You feel voiceless.

Or do you go the other way? Is something happening right now that’s making you angry? And you feel like you have to say something. You want to shout.

I challenge you just to identify, to step back a little bit and observe yourself to see what the natural reactions are in your mind and in your body just so that you’re aware of them.

Step two will be to then control those feelings.

Because the feelings that you get may not be the ones you want. They may not lead you down the optimal path.

So, okay, somebody insults you or threatens you and you feel your heart starting to race. See if you can control that heart rate.

Can you take a breath? Can you slow down? Can you repeat a mantra? Can you squeeze your hands? Is there something you can do to bring your heart rate down?

If you feel that tension in your shoulders or tightness in your jaw, can you relax your neck for a second? Can you drop your shoulders? Can you settle your weight down? Can you feel your feet? Drop it.

Can you do it? This is the question. This is the challenge. Can you control what has come out of your body at this point naturally?

If you feel like you’re shrinking, someone has an advantage on you in some way, and they’re lording it over you, and there’s a power imbalance, can you widen your stance a little bit? Can you broaden your chest a little bit? Can you expand a little bit instead of shrink?

Very small changes that you can control will start opening a door, I think, to bigger changes. So experiment with them.

And of course, if you’re feeling like you shouldn’t say anything, you’re feeling quiet, at least say, I agree, or I disagree. If that’s all you can get out, then at least control that feeling like I shouldn’t say anything. And just say, I agree.

And if you feel like you absolutely have to say something, see if you can zip it. See if you can just let the moment pass without saying something, just for the challenge of control.

Step three. If you’ve identified that first feeling, and controlled it, now, choose your action.

Choose your second technique. That was the first technique, to prepare yourself to make a second movement, a second action. And once you do that, observe the results.

I bet that if you give yourself this power of controlling that first feeling, of putting yourself back into an optimal state, you will get better results in accordance with your goals.

If you’re just reacting and shooting from the hip, you’re going to get what you’ve always gotten, which is where you are today and who you are today. If you’re expecting more of yourself, or if you desire more of yourself and more of your future and better results, then here we are.

Start controlling that first feeling and make more optimal choices. Observe those results and start adding up your data and see which choices led to which results and which ones led to the same old results that you don’t want.

Whether you win or lose, remember you’re winning just because you’re controlling it. Your power is really that you have the choices in your behavior. If you’re just reacting, if you’re just repeating cycles that somehow got wired into you when you were a baby or a kid, then you’re not free to choose and that means you’re stuck.

We’re trying to break that mold. We’re breaking up that wiring and we’re trying to reevaluate and rewire the way we want it to be. To be the person we want to be, to build the character that we want, to be optimal.

So, win or lose, I mean, it doesn’t matter because there’s no guarantees. We all end up dead. We all suffer losses anyway. We’re just trying to make the most of what we’ve got while we’ve got the chance to do something. That’s the optimizing.

And again, it’s natural along this journey to make mistakes and to feel like you didn’t do things right and to in that way give away power because you’re starting to judge yourself like you’ve done something wrong or you’re not good enough. But that’s an illusion.

Remember, you fight back. You keep coming back to this project and get better at it. This is the technique. That’s why I’m calling it a technique.

It’s not just, hey, be a winner. Hey, be awesome. That’s not a technique. That’s just a desire.

The technique is how to change our negative thoughts into positive thoughts. That’s something we have to practice. And we need to do it faster and better than yesterday.

It’s just like a punch. When you learn how to throw a punch or a kick, you’re not very good at it at first. It takes time to develop that skill. Along the way, it starts coming to you faster and more competently. You can throw a better punch and a better kick.

This technique is the same. The technique of mastering the first feeling, the technique of putting yourself in a mind state and a body state that is optimal for the best results. This is something we have to practice.

But if right now it takes you a month to find your optimal state, that’s okay. Then it’s going to take you a couple of weeks to get back to that optimal state. That’s fine. But keep going. Make it so that you can eventually, instantly get back into that optimal state.

Look over at that sparring partner who’s reckless and dangerous. Instantly, you’re at your best. I’m going to deal with them.

Somebody pulls a knife and instantly, I have held on to my power and I’m going to do the best I can to defend myself. That is the goal.

And ultimately, if you can do that fast enough, maybe there will be no transition. Maybe we can just stay in that state all the time. Again, that’s the end goal.

For me right now, I still have fluctuations. I still feel the dips, but I am getting better at how fast I can come back to feeling great again, to being my best. I’ve gotten better at it. It’s a technique, but my goal is still that that’s just who I am. It doesn’t matter what happens.

I’m going to skip the dip. I don’t have to snap back. It’s just in me. And so that will be the challenge for you too.

So that’s what I wanted to share with you today. That’s pretty much it. Let’s recognize that we have an optimal state. So know yourself the best you can and bring it into your control. Because if you can put yourself into your optimal state, then you will be able to make optimal choices.

Those optimal choices are going to lead to optimal results. And that, my friend, will lead to an optimal, happy life.

Whoa, whoa, whoa! Before you go, give yourself a moment right now for a state break. Do what you have to do to put yourself in the best state of mind and state of body that you can. And then, my friend, go forth and conquer.

Until next time, smiles up, my friend. Let that smile be your shield and your sword. Keep fighting for a happy life.